Feb. 28, 2007 - Child Favoritism

Feb 28, 2007

Gen 25:27-28 NET
(27) When the boys grew up, Esau became a skilled hunter, a man of the open fields, but Jacob was an even-tempered man, living in tents.
(28) Isaac loved Esau because he had a taste for fresh game, but Rebekah loved Jacob.
Scripture quoted by permission. Quotations designated (NET) are from the NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2006 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. www.bible.org All rights reserved.

Issac and Rebekah had twin boys, the older being Esau, a hunter and a man of the field. The younger was Jacob who was a more studious man. While Esau was a man who liked to get his hands dirty, Jacob was more a man who would figure out how to get it done without getting a sweat up. Is one type better than the other? If you are a hunter, sportsman, or any outdoor type at all, then you probably think that Esau is more like you. If you like to do stuff on the computer, work out complex number problems or any non-outdoor type, then you will most likely think Jacob is the one you like.

Note that the King James does a disservice in verse 27 (as do most translations) saying he was a plain man. The Strong's numbering indicates many ways the word plain could be translated, and in fact, complete is most likely a better word to use. Esau was a one-dimensional man. Jacob, as we can see in his later life, had a more complete knowledge in many things. Again, there is no crime here in what they were. You can be a good person either way.

Our problem here is really with verse 28. The fact that the parents had favorites is not good. Now I know as a parent it is not easy to not have a favorite child, there is always one you like better than the rest. The situation here was not a slight favoritism, nor even an attempt to hide it. This was out and out take one side against the other. Issac like Esau and Rebekah liked Jacob. In situations like this, only trouble can break out.

Does this happen in every day life as well, I mean when someone is not dealing with children? You bet it does. I took a class recently in Critical Conversations. When someone speaks or does something we often create a story based on our experiences. This story can get well rehearsed in our brain and become our 'child.' Meanwhile, the other side is rehearsing their story and another 'child' is born. We each have our favorites and we are willing to duke it out to get our 'child' to be the prominent one. Maybe we need to stop and not make our 'child' the favorite one. Maybe we need to take the time to see if the other persons story is a real thing that needs to be dealt with and stop promoting ours. And yes, maybe the other side does too. I have a better idea, lets not have favorites and we can stay out of these situations. Think on that the next time you get in a situation at work or home.